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By stephen, January 21, 2010 10:35 pm

It’s been a while since I’ve had a good old rant on here. And before you all leap in and accuse me of being bone idle for getting the shopping delivered in the first place, I must point out that our charmingly cute little boy…

… turns into a manic, foaming at the mouth, hyperactive lunatic (very hard to imagine, I know!!!) if we get him anywhere near a supermarket It’s as if we’ve taken him to the biggest, grandest playground he’s ever seen. Sawyer has an absolute blast once inside. We don’t!!!

Which is why Home Delivery is our preferred method of weekly shop. And as we’re on a bit of an economy drive at the moment, ASDA is our supermarket of choice. It’s cheap and as the saying goes, ‘you get what you pay for.’ We have had a few mishaps in the past with ASDA, but you kind of expect a few every once in a while. Recently however ASDA have been truly and shockingly shite. Our weekly order of Xmas shopping simply failed to turn up and then when it did a few days later we were charged nearly £70 for some fancy sparkly wine that should have been on offer. We complained, ASDA failed to budge, we gave them their fancy pants wine back and the driver gave us a complimentary box of mince pies for our trouble

And then there was this week, which was quite frankly a little bizarre… For probably the first time in ages our shopping did actually arrive within the 2 hour slot we’d selected. The driver dumped our bags onto our doorstep in record time and then disappeared before I’d even picked half of them up. No goodbyes or any awkward little electronic pad to sign; she was off and that was that. Some time later we discovered that a lot of our dairy products hadn’t been delivered.  About 12 items in all, so I rang to complain (it doesn’t take much. I do like a good moan )

‘Hi. We’ve just had our shopping delivered and loads of items are missing.‘

‘Oh I’m sorry. What are the product codes?‘

I then read through our order and gave the woman all of the relevant codes.

‘I’m afraid we won’t be able to re-deliver those items, but I can give you a voucher for a free delivery the next time you order from us.‘

‘I’m guessing that we won’t want to order from ASDA again, so we’ll just have our money back thank-you.‘

‘Oh ok. Is that all?‘

‘Well I guess so. Our shopping would’ve been nice, but I guess we’ll have to go out and buy that from somewhere else now.‘

‘Yes I am sorry. I’ll give you a voucher anyway.‘

We then re-ordered most of what had been missing from lovely Sainsburys and got butter & milk from the local shop…

Last night we had a knock on the door. An ASDA delivery man was stood on our doorstep with bags of shopping.

‘Hi. It’s your shopping.‘

‘We were told it couldn’t be re-delivered. We’ve had a refund and re-ordered the stuff.‘

‘Well it’s your shopping, you may as well have it.‘

‘We didn’t order that much milk!!!‘

‘Well you may as well have it.‘

So last night we had over 14 pints of milk rammed into our fridge We can’t eat the cereals fast enough at the moment!!!

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By stephen, January 18, 2010 12:05 pm

The Dark Knight (2008)

Easily the best Batman film to date, but what the hell was that ever so charming Christian Bale doing with his Batman voice I’d call it gravelly, but that doesn’t even come close!!! Heath Ledger, simply awesome.

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By stephen, January 11, 2010 12:23 pm

Mulholland Drive (2001)

Not so mini, only because I’m a huge David Lynch fan and I’d find it really hard to squash my review into my usual one sentence version!!! Being such a huge fan, I’ll have to admit it’s slightly embarrassing that it’s actually taken me this long to finally watch Mulholland Drive. But thanks to a lovely Lynch box-set from my lovely wife, that was put right last night. Inland Empire is next on the list…

I guess the first thing to say about Mulholland Drive is that it’s very typical of Lynch, which is all very well if you like his style. Tracy’s not quite as besotted on Lynch as I am and I’m sure her review would be very different and a lot more concise than mine; ‘What the fuck?!?!‘ springs to mind. For me, the film was surreal, dark, disturbing, bizarre and made little or no sense in places (typical Lynch). The cast was littered with stunningly good looking females (typical Lynch), freaky weird characters (typical Lynch) and a midget (has Lynch made anything without a midget?). The soundtrack, as Lynch soundtracks usually are, was brilliantly haunting… I was hugely confused (typical Lynch), but did enjoy this a lot.

On a negative side I’ll say this. Mulholland Drive was initially intended as a TV series, but got rejected and I can’t help feeling that it would’ve worked so much better broken down into a series of 50′ish minute episodes. It’s why Twin Peaks worked so much better than the film version. I’m sure Tracy was quite happy with just 2 hours of Mulholland Drive, but I’d have like to have seen Lynch get the opportunity to expand it further… Maybe he did in Inland Empire? I’ll have to wait & see on that one.